Back at place

The most satisfying thing in the world for me is putting things back in their rightful place, returning wonder to the heart and helping people find their roar again.

That’s why my great love for guiding people who rise up against toxic relationships and abusive partnerships has brought countless stories like these into my clinic. 

So let me tell you how it works.

There are very few people in this world who instinctively understand that what harms them is harmful enough to resist. Most people are born into a kind of web, a honey trap that  quietly teaches them: It’s okay that you’re suffering. That’s just how life is, and there’s nothing to be done about it.

It’s annoying, and difficult to look at. But passing through that place is important, because eventually you must decide which part of humanity you choose to belong to: those who wake up and find the strength to learn how to roar, and those who remain there forever.

That is what makes the process of rising up so beautiful and inspiring: it’s not natural for us.

And so a sentence like “You don’t break up a family over this” becomes an effective stone around the neck of anyone who suffers and doesn’t know where to find the strength to resist. The world is indeed divided on this matter, and eventually you have to choose a side.

How do you choose? You strengthen your connection to simple truth.

Yesterday we practiced an excellent mental exercise.

Take the sentence “You don’t break up a family over this” and ask yourself: if your husband trampled you while riding a horse, would you get up and leave? If your wife spat in your face, would you find the strength to walk away? If someone left you to die in a tunnel, would that justify ending the relationship?

That’s where it begins. Sometimes you can start by simply shouting “shame,” by roaring it out.

Half a million people whose voices helped bring the hostages home chose the right side. They chose to restore the right to roar, a responsibility for anyone seeking to break free from toxic relationships. In return they gained the ability to feel awe, emotion and meaning in knowing they helped save lives.

So to everyone whose ears burn at the sound of that roar, it’s okay. All you’re doing is strengthening it.

Because there is no difference between a partner who spits on you and a Prime Minister who spits on you. Rising up is beautiful.

And for anyone trying to find the courage to rise up, I’m here to walk through it with you.